Tuesday, February 28, 2012

Sometimes I just ask myself HOW the fuck can I still have so strong feelings that are not harmful.
Since my heart has been broken, I live feeling it. Every. Single. Second.
Every pound is pain.
But then some explosions come, like, wow. Faith... love. Faith in love? Loving faith? Who cares?
My strenght surprises me, as well as the autodestructive part. But strenght is stronger.
You might get what you don't expect.
You are allowed to fall down but hey
you MUST get up. Everysingletime. 
the sun rises up everyday

Sunday, February 12, 2012

sollozos

Llegó a casa. Nada más la puerta se cerró detrás de ella de un golpe, cogió una gran bocanada de aire y la dejó salir, lenta, pausadamente, mientras los ojos se le anegaban de lágrimas y la respiración se le hacía inestable. Sollozaba, al principio, profundamente hasta que los pulmones comenzaron a agitarse y no pudo parar. Lloró, alto, gritando, expulsando de sí el dolor tan profundo que la corroía. Pero aún expulsado, hecha un amasijo humano en el recibidor, el veneno seguía dentro de ella. Fingir no era fácil.

Saturday, February 4, 2012

daddy's birthday

hey dad.
I thought that, as you don't want any present but my calmness, I could write something to you...
I'm sorry I am not what you expected me to be
I'm sorry I have an illness you can't understand
I'm sorry that you feel like nothing of what you do has an effect on me
I'm so fucking sorry that sometimes you think I don't love you
I'm sorry that you have to think that I don't take advantage of what I am and what I have
Somedays I'm just so damn sorry for being alive and I become so so so fucking self-destructive
I thank life for the parents I have... I didn't even have to do anything to get them
I swear I don't want to hurt you
I swear I don't want to make you worry
I swear I don't want you to get hurt... and I don't want you to feel powerless
I love you
I love you to infinity and beyond, and I hope that from now to a year things really CHANGE.
I'll be by your side until the end of time.
London Tube
Until the end of your-my time.